Yahoo...Yahweh...whatever

Today on Yahoo Answers - "What happens when you die? Click here to find out!"

Phew. I'm glad they figured that out 'cause it's been buggin' me for years.

strike that

Not only is Booty Parlor acceptable, it is, in fact, awesome. That is, if Booty Parlor was a band whose members dressed like pirates. "Yarr, we be Booty Parlor. Prepare to rock the plank!"

Wow, I'm such a tremendous dork.

nothin' says classy...

Victoria's Secret has a new series of bedroom products that includes items such as body chocolate and massage oil. This is perfectly acceptable. What is not acceptable is the fact that the product line is called "Booty Parlor".

why, indeed...oh dear lord WHY

http://youtube.com/watch?v=e7ZBOj7xr9k

not quite kindergarten

Erin: Is it company nap time yet?
Ryan: Oh man, I could fuck the shit out of a nap right now.

sweet nothings

"I hate you, I hate you, I hate you...poohead."

forthwith

I want waffles.

All Hail the Bucket!

Welcome to the scenic seaside country of Hotlantistan. Please feel free to explore our many provinces, such as Vitamin City, with its glorious tradition of disposable contact lenses and bigotry; Southwest Northumbria, land of asparagus and one-way streets; and Northeast Kiraquistanamy, the province at war with everyone including itself. Watch us declare civil war on Tennessee, and be sure to catch one of the hourly launchings of tainted egg salad. Long live Hotlantistan - chill out, what the fuck, and shut up.

clearly

The best sentence I've read this week:

Kinda lab is halfway between over there awesome and lobster death.

Ay, the hot pants

The very existence of the Sea Captain is testament to the brilliance of the creator / writers of The Simpsons. They understood that any show would be less funny if it lacked a character who talks like a pirate.

Is that a troll under your bridge or are you just happy to see me?

I am thoroughly amused by the fact that I have only found the need to post something twice (now three times) in the past 6 days and all entries have involved goats.

Alice went where?

It is now my mission to find a place on earth that goes by the motto "The Land of Goats and Nothingness." If you know of such a place, please contact me.

and the winner is...

The best sentence I've read this week:

Goats of Christmas past have been burned down on 22 occasions.

(Yes, it said goats.)