nothing rhymes with Elizabeth

Ahhhhh!!! I have it!!!

I don't want to live on the moon

overwhelmed by awesome memories

things recede

I've decided to view it as a crisis averted.

we are amused

http://chicago.craigslist.org/zip/121020997.html

time for a new list

~Things I Never Thought Would be Said to Me~

1) "You can tell me about your non-existant gay love affair."
2) "The middle of your tongue is...jacked up."
3) "I don't want to see Britney Spears' head on your body."

- to be continued-

Mr. Kevin

There's nothing more touching than some well-lit three- dimensional shark art.

the airing of grievances

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

from all sides

I'm just going to buy a whole lot of cats and get it over with.

"It's got purple in it..."

Caking is a perfectly cromulent word.

I hate you, Fox.

The Bob Loblaw Law Blog. This idea alone should warrant at least another three seasons.

chocolate ok

This weekend I witnessed blatant misuse of the cacao plant.

red scare

Apparently the subject of communism is still extremely taboo. (At least this is the case in redneck-themed northern Chicagoland eateries.)

food, memories, ...german dancers?

No matter how long it's been, we remain ridiculous together.

sugar-induced coma

Today I am quite pleased with my employment situation. I actually said to myself, "I like this job." This particular mood has to be truly rare and therefore documentation is in order. You know, so that in the future I can prove to myself that I actually did feel this way at some point.

spellective amnesia

I just had one of those moments where I couldn't figure out whether I'd spelled a word correctly. One of those silly little everyday words that you learn how to spell when you're about five years old. I don't like it when that happens. It's like I witnessed the death of a brain cell or two.

hangin' tough, stayin' hungry

Classic 80's hits always brighten my day. Corporate library dance party. Aww yeah.

anyone?...something d-o-o economics...

I just attended my first business presentation. It was about franchise laws and procedures. I swear I haven't been so enthralled since I first encountered The Big Book of Off-White Paint Samples.

how now

There's a reason it's known as a "cattle call" - to alert people to the fact that it would probably be a better use of your time to go cow-tipping.

If only everything in life was as reliable as a Walrus.

I love this site.

http://www.thesurrealist.co.uk/slogan.cgi

"She'll see it later, honey. Her eyes are frozen."

Stupid Smarch weather.